Ornament Advent

I'm going to steal Emily's ornament advent idea, but I don't have enough to fill the rest of the days (I only have 12). So it'll have to wait.

Well, on Sunday I went downtown to the other Macy's. They had even less than they did in Roseville. I was really pissed off. I really like Christmas decorations. Then I went to TG and got even more pissed off there. I was in a pretty bad mood by the time I left. Then I drove home and I was really hungry. Plus, the roads were snowy. So not the greatest day, but whatever.

Today the roads were bad again. Someone suggested I go to Pier 1 for Christmas stuff so I did. I found the one thing I had my heart set on (which I can't describe because it is a present for a person that reads this). It's funny though. I'll talk about it after I give it to the person.

I had a mild nervous breakdown about something at work today. I sent something that I said was broken, and then I left at like 12:15.  Then as I was driving away I thought that I tested it wrong and it maybe wasn't broken. So I called Joel twice and left messages about it. Then I just said to forget it and I'd check it later because I realized it was dumb to worry about. I did check it later, and I hadn't done anything wrong. So it was all for naught. I worry a lot about that stuff though, for no reason really.

Sometimes I wonder why I have a blog. My life is so boring. Anyway I really want to finish up cleaning and decorating tonight. I wonder if I can do it. I don't have that much stuff left. Maybe I can make it a goal to post pictures of my holiday apartment. It looks a lot different than when some of you have seen it last, mainly because of a) the bookshelf, b) I rearranged my bedroom, and c) the decorations. It doesn't really take much. Since my apartment is like 2 feet by 3 feet, a bookshelf seems like a life-altering piece of furniture.

Later.

Help!

I'm listening to my radio show and can't stop laughing. You know that Toni Braxton song, "Unbreak my heart"? Someone on The X Factor (like American Idol in England) sang that and they played it on the show. They were like "This is so low!" Then one of the guys put on a super low voice filter and sang along. It was like Barry White x 3. It is soooooo funny. I should record it and put it on my blog later. I can't stop laughing.

Another "rage" incident

I went to Macy's today (rhymes with "tacky") and people are idiots there. I almost smacked someone. I was also extremely disappointed in their Christmas selection. I don't know if it's located somewhere else or what, but they had almost nothing. I think it has to be somewhere else. I was too tired so I left. I should try the one downtown Minneapolis if I ever feel like going there. My sister said it's closing. :(. Maybe I'll try tomorrow.

 

Anyway I got a wool coat there for about 50% off. I love it. It made up for the morons who walked 0.0000001 mph. I also walked around Mall Of America a little bit and got some presents. I had to get my ring cleaned. Surprisingly, it wasn't as bad as Macy's.

P.S. The cashier at Macy's called me "kiddo".

3rd post! I'm on a roll!

I just read an entire book in about 2 hours. It was a book by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross about grief. In the book there were some parts about God and the afterlife, since basically the book was about people dying. I realized while reading those parts that I don't believe in God at all. It kind of surprised me. It worries me a little bit as well. Believing in God seems really wrong to me. I guess that's the only way I can explain it. I don't see how it's possible at all.

I haven't thought about this for a long time because it just isn't important enough for me to think about. But it's come up a lot recently. All the other people I interact with at the hospital and in my family are really religious and I feel awkward about it. Honestly, I think it's stupid. I don't see why I should have to talk about religion when I don't have any kind of belief except that I don't have a belief. They don't really care, I don't think, but I feel weird about it.

It kind of worries me just because of the massive amounts of people that do believe in God. I don't really know how I can be "right". But reading the stuff in the book was just ridiculous to me. To me it seems like people are expecting their refrigerator to cure cancer. It's that ridiculous. I don't get it. Or that they're counting on the ladybug on my ceiling to give me a million dollars. I don't know. I just think it's dumb and I don't get it, and it worries me.

At the same time, I don't really want to get it. I don't want to be one of those God-y people. They annoy me.

Otherwise, I think the book was good. A bunch of people at the hospital recommended books lately so I got about 4 and this was one. I think it was good. Another one I have is also a little religious so I'm kind of iffy on that. But, at least the recommender did say that as a disclaimer and understood my misgivings.

A dumb thing

I saw this on facebook, it's just itunes on shuffle and the first line from the song that comes up and then people have to guess the song. Whatever. I just like crap like this for my own amusement, because I doubt even I could get more than like 1 of these and they're my own songs.

1. Waiting, waiting by the phone, tonight waiting for an answer

2. where were you in 92, where were you in 92, where were you in 92, where were you in 92

3. Everything is lost, oh oh

4. Blond girl I missed you

5. Poor little rose, beaten by the rain 

6. The first flush of youth was upon you when our eyes first met

7. I am my mother's only one, it's enough

8. Welcome to suburbia, welcome to the rest of your life

9. And I will flail under these lights

10.I cannot remember my own sanity

11. I lost myself on a cool damp night

12. Last week i had the strangest dream where everything was exactly how it seemed

13. On the field I remember you were incredible

14. On, it's on I declare my room a scene

15. Gray light, new day leaks through the window

16. Bakvið skýjabol vaknar sól ur dvala

17. Oh brother I can't, I can't get through

18. I came back on the trail of a man

19. You were a child crawling on your knees toward it

20. If I could open my arms and span the length of the isle of Manhattan

Here are the answers

1. Ladyhawke - My Delirium (Emily, you should try this song because it is by a Kiwi named Pip. And it's a great song that I'm obsessed with)

2. MIA - XR2

3. Sufjan Stevens - Perpetual Self

4. Jens Lekman - Rocky Dennis' Farewell Song

5. Ryan Adams - I Taught Myself How To Grow Old

6. The Darkness (Laura's Favorite Band) - Love Is Only A Feeling

7. Bon Iver - Flume

8. Jeremy Messersmith - Welcome to Suburbia

9. Saves The Day - Nightingale

10. The Vines - Amnesia

11. Jeff Buckley - Lilac Wine

12. Postal Service - Sleeping In

13. The Killers - Andy, You're a Star

14. Jimmy Eat World - Here it Goes

15. Bright Eyes - Old Soul Song (For The New World Order)

16. Sigur Rós - Hafssól

17. Coldplay - Talk

18. Long Winters - Bride and Bridle

19. MGMT - Kids

20. Death Cab For Cutie - Marching Bands of Manhattan (aka Pinhole Camera)

Christmas comes this time each year

Every time I hear that Beach Boys song I laugh. It's like saying "My birthday is always on the same day."

Lately I've been experiencing a lot of 'roid rage. Kidding....I actually mean road rage. I get so angry at people. Today I got really angry at 4 people just on the way home from the grocery store. One was a biker who went through a red light. WHY do people do that?? I screamed at the top of my lungs at that guy. One was a guy who was going 45 in the parking lot. One was a guy who cut me off. One was a woman who drifted across 4 lanes of traffic with no signal, and no attempt to go slightly faster to get over. I just can't deal with idiot drivers. I'm sure I do some things that P people off, but I just can't deal. I get SO mad. I need to go to road anger management or something.

I saw Ryan Adams today at the hospital. :D Really though it was some doctor. Wouldn't that be awesome, though? He is going to be in town next week I think. Maybe he was checking it out.

Well I don't really have anything else to say. Later.

College Years

I was just rearranging my room, which is a big task for me, and I located those notes that Emily, Sarah, and I wrote to each other to be opened in a year (on 2/9/02). Here is what my best qualities are/were, according to S.

a "wiz" at computers

amazing at memorizing lyrics to songs

a good e-mailer

good @ filling out surveys

good @ playing the ukulele

good at making your voice sound like annoying instruments

always on time

soft hands

a very witty writer

soft hair

the perfect height

has a good sense of smell.

My favorite part of Emily's letter (despite the fact that she wrote Happy Halloween and it was February)  is when she mentioned the "You Better!" that was on their computer as the warning noise. I'm laughing a lot remembering that. "You better!...click on this." God, that's funny. And when the computer started up, it said "Name this continent! ASIA."

Do you guys remember when I volunteered at the Daily Cardinal for a semester? How interesting to think about. I hardly remember it, except that it was when I first started dating Kyle and when I first got into Bright Eyes. There was one day when we must have just started dating because I was really happy about that, and I was walking to Vilas and listening to this one song and it was snowing. Every time I hear that song I think of that moment. That was kind of a cool job, if not really mundane. I guess it's not the worst job ever, though. I think what I did was upload that day's stories and photos to the website. I had to do something in Quark, but I think it was just getting the text from the pages. I didn't actually edit anything.

I also saved two of the lecture hall bingo(e)s from the Daily Cardinal. I always thought they were hilarious and they still are, to me. Here are some of them. Feel free to add some if you think of any. :D

Student falling asleep

TA doesn't show up

Obvious member of a frat

Obvious member of a sorority

Football player attends class

Cell phone rings

Prof. can't work mic

Clock moves backward

Girl leaves way too early

Prof can't work power point

Bored looking hipster

Student writing on desk

Guy attending for first time

Girls won't stop talking

Prof gets chalk on him/herself

Girl picks hair off sweater

Entire issue of Onion read

Guy listening to headphones

Prof runs out of handout

4 UW shirts in a row

Weekend plans overheard

I want to try to think of some myself.

Girl who can't breathe through her nose

Awkwardly long, horrible silence (after a teacher asks a question)

Students pack up backpacks 10 minutes early

All the aisle seats are taken first

Someone kicks your chair repeatedly

Girl flips her hair onto your desk

Someone smells really bad

You have to cough really badly during a test

You have to pass a paper to someone sitting 100 feet away

Someone has a really bad muffin top

Guy wearing shorts in January

You have to walk from Memorial Library to Engineering and you only have 10 minutes! Go!!!

Idiots!

I was driving up Cleveland today and experience the worst run of traffic in a while. Actually it wasn't just that road. Several times today people just walked across the road wherever they were, not even looking. Ok, that's fine in a crosswalk. But these weren't. I think that pedestrians generally forget what it's like to be a driver. It happens to me occasionally too, I'll admit.

 

I submit that people forget what it's like being a driver the second they turn off their car. This follows from the 2 near-doorings that I was a part of on Cleveland. Not one but two people drove to the side and just got out of the car (door open wide). Without looking. One was right after a busy and chaotic intersection so that was really close. It's like, I think most people just notice themselves, when they don't realize that it might be hard to see them. I'm aware when I'm trying to cross a street, but the cars aren't necessarily, especially if it's dark.

 

Another issue. Changing lanes in an intersection. Don't do it. Weaving in and out of lanes to avoid people turning left. Turning in front of me really quickly, causing me to brake suddenly, when there is nobody behind me. Not using turn signals. Tailgating. All these things cause ire.

 

Turn signal omission is something that drives me up the wall. I HATE it. Rage from incidents of turn signal non-usage stay with me for a while afterwards. It's one thing in a parking lot or something, but in regular driving it's just idiotic. It causes me to sit there like a moron waiting when I don't need to, or it just makes the other person look like a lazy jerk. Ahhh, nonchalantly wandering over to this lane now. Now I'm just gonna go over here. Ugh.

 

The KARE 11 newscasters were just having a really dumb conversation. It sounded like they were trying to stall. Anyway...I think I'm getting a cold. :( My sinuses have the pre-sickness ache.

 

No way. I just saw a guy talking about the economy and his nametag said "Mr. Crapo". No way!! Is it just me or does Henry Paulson look and act like a wrestler?

Oh yeah

My dad told us today that he got laid off. Luckily (or not) he got 30 days notice. It really sucks for a bunch of reasons. Anyway my family is in crisis mode. Within the span of a week or two around Halloween, almost everyone in my immediate family had a giant catastrophe. I won't go into it now, but man. I keep thinking "When it rains, it pours". I actually kind of wonder how we're all basically functioning normally. That's all for now. The kitten just made a funny face at me.

Review this record, warden

Every time I see this clip, I laugh hysterically. Check out around 35 seconds in. You won't be sorry.

Coldplay

I get to see Coldplay tomorrow! (With Laura). It's been a while I think. I don't remember what the last show was. It can't have been the one in Milwaukee? 3 years ago or something? No way. Now I'm curious. I just looked at my website and it was - 03/19/06. It's been a while...........since I could hold my head up high. NO! Get out of my head, Staind. And while you're at it, spell your name correctly.

We have good seats, so I will take my camera and attempt to get good pictures.

Today I met a girl named Jamie who used to work at my work. That was weird. She worked in a different area, though. She said she wants to be a web developer so she's going to start taking classes. I was so excited for her! She has Meniere's (sp?) so she can't hear very well, but she is really nice. And really pretty too.

Bye! Good (Bonus points if you know to what that is a reference)

Obama song

Hi. I spent some time tonight putting these clips together so everyone could hear this. I listen to this BBC show called The Chris Moyles Show and the other day he came up with this Barack Obama song. It will really get into your head. I have been singing it for a week.

I guess there really isn't much behind the clips. These are the people on the show: Chris, Dave, Dominic, Carrie, Rachel, and Aled. Mostly Chris and Dave talk and the rest pipe in. Dave is my favorite.

The funniest clip is the first one from 11-10 because they started coming up with other names to put with the song. I was listening to that Mon. morning and laughing my ass off. A funny part, to me, is the fact that I never know the celebrities they talk about. Every day I learn about a new person.

Anyway I highly recommend these clips, and if you only feel like listening to one or two, do the first one from 11.6 and the first one from 11/10.

11/6 - 1 (4:25)

11/6 - 2 (1:18)

11/6 - 3 (2:18)

11/6 - 4 (3:20)

11/7 - 1 (5:11)

11/10 - 1 (7:06)

11/10 - 2 (3:10)

11/11 - 1 (1:45)

11/11 - 2 (3:37)

All of them in a zip file

And that is my campaign to get everyone to know the song. :)

P.S. Emily, in one of those clips is Zane Lowe, who is a Kiwi!

Another bout of uncontrollable laughter

http://emilynotinkorea.blogspot.com/2008/11/vote-difference-between-franken-and.html

 

Here's a post on Emily's blog that is funny. I was making some laugh-choking sounds a minute ago at work and of course it's silent in here right now. The things that get me are the 0 in 08, Franken's face, and those two guys that are small and in the middle (Who are those guys? Should I know?). Also I really love the name Claymation "Big Teeth" Horseface. Personally, I call him Glued-on Teeth "Construction Paper Blush" Annoying Accent, but either are fine. Good job, Emily. I shared it with a coworker, who enjoyed it.

 

 

Odd

Get this widget!

Fire alarm

The fire alarm in the hallway is going off. I wonder if it's a bad thing that I don't really heed the warning. I am hearing running footsteps upstairs. I peeked around and didn't see anything so I guess I'll just stay in here. I don't know. Augh! The emergency doors just shut. I'm going to look around again. Ah it just went off, and there are some sirens. That freaked Daniel out. And me...I was calmly watching MST3K.

The Franken thing is now a margin of 238 votes because they found some kind of typo. What kind of typo would result in Franken getting 300 votes? They specifically said they were all Franken votes. 

Christ those sirens are loud, and someone is constantly reopening the emergency doors. Are 28 fire trucks here or something? I guess it was fast enough.

I heard some funny stuff on the radio today that I want to share when I get a chance. Back to the movie. But seriously...it sounds like every emergency vehicle in the state is driving into the apartment complex right now.

Senate

In case some of you guys didn't hear, our Senate race (the Al Franken one) was insane. Right now I guess it's finished, but the final vote is a separation of about 500 votes (1,211,643 to 1,211,167). Isn't that ridiculous? I kind of have a difficult time believing that that actually happened. That really sucks for the person that lost (Al Franken). Especially since Norm Coleman has glue-on teeth and construction paper blush. Sorry, I don't like him. On NPR this morning they were talking about the independent party candidate and how he affected this race. He got about 15% of the vote. I sometimes wonder how those votes would go, because I don't think they'd necessarily go to the DFL person. But, I think that in this case they would have (I don't remember though, it might have been equal). I sort of thought about voting for Barkley, the independent candidate, but since I have been educated in the democratic process, and how it's two parties and will be for a long time, I decided that it would do more harm than good, especially in a Senate race which doesn't have the electoral thing (and especially because polls had them so close). It seems like this happens again and again and again in elections. "Hey, let's check out what a third party can do!" It would be fine if it didn't totally skew everything. I am not against the idea of a third party, but people need to put things in perspective and notice situations where it's just not going to happen, which is almost every time (I don't know what happened with Ventura). I realize I might sound like a complete idiot right now, especially to people with a political science degree such as Emily. However, this third party thing really bothers me. It's like, ok, you're trying to make a point and change the country or whatever. Can't you focus your efforts on something else, such as the gay marriage ban or feeding small children or something? The amount of money that's going into these campaigns could do a lot of good somewhere else. Whatever...I guess I'm anti-change when it comes to this.

 

Anyway, does it not just feel so much happier today? In 2000 and 2004 it was like the black death had descended on us all. I get that it's just the things I choose to read and watch, but still. I think in general people are pretty pleased. The fact that he's the first black president really makes people feel good. On AVC people from other countries were going "good job" all day and everything. :)

 

Did anyone watch the Stewart/Colbert thing? My favorite part was when they announced South Carolina and Colbert was on there with 0% of the votes. :)

Voting

I went into work this morning and the power was out, so I decided to leave to vote. I walked in and saw a KARE 11 camera there. I forgot about it until I finished my ballot and turned around whilst wiping my brow because it was hot in there. Directly behind me was the camera, filming. I almost ran into it. I was like, wonderful, now my ugly mug is going to be stock voting footage on KARE 11. I had to walk in front of it AGAIN to leave. Anyway, now I'm at home because the power is still out at work. I should have told someone to call me when it goes back on. Oh well.

Spider Pig

Do you guys remember the Spider Pig song from the Simpsons movie? Well I was just watching a MST3K episode where they sang the same thing, except it was Spider Skank. Same tune and everything. I was confused because MST3K has been off the air for over 10 years. So I thought that probably they were both referencing a third party. Does anyone know what it is? I can't find it online anywhere. I guess it's possible that the Simpsons could have been referencing the MST3K thing, but I doubt it. It would be difficult to reference that show, I think.

My mom just announced that some guy is moving in with her. He's from New York and they met online. I guess he's moving in on Wednesday. My sisters and I are in denial and semi-rage right now. I cannot believe she is doing this. Apparently he quit his job and is just dropping everything. First of all, my mom doesn't have a good track record with relationships since she got divorced. All of the guys she met are creepy. And she never seems to like them. She's always saying how creepy they are, except for this one guy who ended up stalking her. Secondly, this is dangerous on many levels - financial, physical, mental, etc. My primary fear is that my sister is going to have to live in the same house as this random guy now. Who knows what he'll do? I can't believe my mom is putting my sister in this position. My other sister and I told her not to go over there anymore, and maybe Mom would get the point then. I doubt it'll be that easy, but whatever. All of my mom's boyfriends live in really far away locales. I wonder if she does this on purpose so she can go there. She "dated" this one guy from Australia and went there. She "dated" this guy from Florida and basically adopted his foster kids or something. That was weird. She brought them to my uncle's wedding and they were in the family photos with my sisters and I. I had never met them before. Most people were P-ed off at that. P.S. Both of those guys and all the others were deemed "creepy" by my mom. The more I am thinking about this, the more worried I am. That isn't a sentence, but hopefully you know what I mean. My sister is upset. She stayed home from school today because of it. I don't blame her. Anyway that's the story for today - my mom has crossed a line.

Happy Halloween

I started off this day by waking up at 2:45 for work (after going to bed at 12). We had a big code release that I helped test. I stayed until 7 yesterday too, but that's nothing compared to the select few that had to stay here all night (such as poor Nate who was later discovered asleep in the conference room). So I woke up and my boss called me at some point and said "Log on and start testing". I did that and then I realized that something was running on my computer and I probably killed it. That was a great way to start out. (I did kill it).

I then tested until about 8:30 and then came in to work. Later, I experienced narcolepsy. I'm definitely not as young as I used to be.

Then my boss and the other woman on my team and I all sat around and talked for a while and it was hilarious. They are actually really funny. They're pretty quiet in usual life, like me, but we had a hilarious conversation about work. I enjoyed it. (Right now they're over there giggling about something - they sit next to each other and I'm a little offset). Then they both said "We're so happy you're on our team!" and asked how I liked it, to which I responded, "Soooooo much better". I really do. I've been here for officially a month and I love it. The best part is I am totally free from my old boss, and thus, I am free from office politics. :D It's so nice not to have that stress. And, I actually have work to do now. I have actually found myself unable to keep up with AV Club lately and so I have to read it at home, which doesn't usually happen. Joel is in a terrible mood this week though, which is too bad.

Well, I gotta go back to struggling to stay awake. Later. I can't believe tomorrow is November. Relatedly, Fall Back is this weekend and I was actually annoyed to hear about it. One thing I really don't need, in general, is more sleep. (Today is the exception of course).

Sudden Cardiac Awareness

Recently on the radio there have been a lot of ads for what is called "Sudden Cardiac Awareness Month". This confuses me. Are people all over the world suddenly becoming aware that they have a heart? And is this bad? I have thought a lot about this campaign and listened to the ads for it, and I have not yet been able to make sense of what they say in the ads. They say things like "Every year, x amount of people are stricken by SCA". To me, that stands for Sudden Cardiac Awareness, because a) They didn't say what it actually stood for, and b) they also call October SCA Month. So in my mind, x people are stricken by Sudden Cardiac Awareness, which goes back to the idea of "Holy shit, I have a heart!" Obviously that isn't it, but I didn't know what it actually was.

Finally I looked it up and it's Sudden Cardiac Arrest. So it's just really unclear and not a well thought out campaign.

These are my thoughts from today. Happy Sudden Cardiac Awareness Month!

Farm Insurance

I am listening to this BBC show that I like to listen to, and they were talking about this American football game that's going on. One of them got a hold of a calendar of some of the dancers of one of the teams, I think it was the Saints. They noticed that each month was sponsored by some American company, and so they were reading off the company names and laughing at them. So one of them was State Farm Insurance. And the people were like "Farm insurance?? There's such a thing as farm insurance?" Hahahaha...I laughed a lot at that.

 

I like that show. Recently they've been doing a "Miley Cyrus" impression which is just one of the guys with a filter on his voice to make it sound high. She doesn't even have an American accent. It's funny, they are really, really good at different UK accents but they absolutely cannot do an American accent.

Gas Station Trip

I just went to the gas station and got hit on. I thought I would mention it on my blog because it hardly ever happens to me. The guy was also staring at my chest. Great place and method to pick up girls, the gas station and by staring at their chests! Classy! Also, the guy was like 10 years younger than me. Again, really classy.

I also performed my good deed of the day while there. A woman left her kid in the car and went inside, and I kept an eye on the kid while some dubious looking people wandered over and were loitering near her car. I gave them The Eye. I've been told my The Eye is really scary, so I thought that probably foiled any plan they had of stealing the car with the kid in it. Call me Crime Stopper Elizabeth.

Autism

I was just reading on Friday Buzzkills that Jenny McCarthy thinks she cured her son's autism with a gluten-free diet. Am I stupid, or is that impossible? How can diet affect autism at all? Sorry, I forgot that she included lots of prayer.

I watched the movie Jesus Camp yesterday and it kind of disturbed me. Most of the reason was that the kids were 6 years old and violently pro-life. Come on...they don't even know what abortion is. If you're going to be pro-life as an adult, fine, but this was just weird. Emily, you should watch that if you haven't. It would be fun to talk about with you.

I saw Melissa this evening (I'm in Rochester) and it was fun. Now I am blogging about it. Do you guys ever wonder how people lived without the internet (15 years ago)? I don't think I could do it. Seriously. Sometimes I think that I am made of the internet. Kind of like those people in that one Stargate episode.

Edit: I forgot to mention that the other day there was an AVC Q&A about best concerts ever and I wrote my story about the Coldplay show where they dedicated a song to me. Mostly everyone said "Great story!" Even Josh Modell who is an AVC writer in Chicago. I got a comment from Josh Modell! :)

P.P.S. To everyone who lives in Madison: go to Decider: Madison. It's a site by AVC and The Onion and it has Madison events, restaurants, etc. I said that I would tell everyone about it and I have been trying to think of the best way to do that and I guess it's here. There is a Twin Cities one coming out early next year. They already have a Chicago one where I wrote a little bit on a Sigur Ros article. The Madison one looks good so far. It was launched last week. I think you guys will love it!

Unwanted Laughter

I'm sitting at work right now and it's silent in the office. I decided to read something on AV Club and I read something funny and can't stop laughing. I'm trying really hard not to burst into audible laughter. I thought maybe writing on here would help. Oh god...here it is again. Stop! Stop!!! I feel like I'm back in college trying not to laugh during a lecture. Though really I could just go to into the bathroom or something. Ok, I think it's gone for good now. Nope, I had to go into the bathroom. Man that was funny.

 

Speaking of where I sit now, it has the weirdest acoustics. I kind of hate it. Sometimes, like now, it's deadly silent. The rest of the times it's not loud, but there are lots of individual voices. It's like, either it's silent or I can hear 20 people's conversations. It's not combined together enough to create just one noise that I can tune out. Plus, I can hear everything everyone in the area says even if they aren't near me. So I got some noise cancelling headphones and so far they are working well. A few times I heard my old boss say something and she's way the hell over on another side. So I emailed her with a response once and I could hear her laugh. You guys know how weird I am about noises. So add this one to the bunch I guess. All right, I gotta finish up and leave. Later.

Order #7

I finally ordered this Icelandic game that I want (from Iceland). I found a site to order it on a few months ago but I can't get it on there because they don't ship overseas, so I found a different one today. I went to pay for it, first of all, and it said that the only payment type accepted was cash on delivery. Huh? How will they enforce that halfway around the world? And how will I actually do that? Go to FedEx and pay the FedEx guy? Mail the person a check later on? Go to a currency place and convert $43.00 to Icelandic Krona and mail it? Do they even have Icelandic Krona anywhere? Then, I noticed on my order confirmation that was emailed to me: Order number 7. Huh? I can't be only the 7th order. Even if this was a brand new site, you'd think they would have done more than 6 test orders, or started their numbering system with 1000 instead of 1, or something. Order number 7. I feel great about this order and I am sure it will go through without any problems. [rolls eyes]

 

I'm kind of thinking that the overseas delivery option was a mistake, but I'm hoping they'll do it anyway. I guess it's possible it wasn't a mistake. For one thing, they got the address formatted correctly for the US even though I had to enter it in 27 different boxes. Usually they don't quite get it right. When my teacher mailed me my diploma I'm surprised it even got to me. It was like a Yoda address. (Which is funny since I sent it to her in an email formatted correctly). Secondly, a lot of the site was in English, which makes me feel better.

 

Iceland is terrible with online stuff, I've noticed, when it comes to someone who doesn't live there using the services. First you have the address thing and how it's impossible to format yours correctly. I would like to mention that at my job when we have an international address, we allow you to format it how you want. Then you have their ID numbers. They have this ID number system there, apparently, and they want you to enter the ID number everywhere. Obviously I don't have one of those. At one place I've looked at (this dictionary site), they wouldn't let me do anything without one. I typed in "none" and that worked. At that same site, I had to pay for something and the only way you could pay was with a bank transfer. WTF? I had NO idea how to do that. I looked around for a while at Wells Fargo but saw nothing. I thought maybe PayPal would work, but that didn't either. So I can't get a subscription there, which sucks. So now we got COD and bank transfers as the primary means of payment to Icelandic merchants. The school that I am enrolled in actually allows credit cards, surprisingly. But they have the worst problem with addresses.

Unbelievable

I just went to the gas station and managed to injure myself on my car door. The car door has a dangerous point on it. I jammed my arm into it kind of hard and it hurt really bad. I'll have a big bruise. Then, I looked at it and it scraped skin off too! I was wearing a sweater!! Lame. So that was my exciting lunch trip.

Crazy evening

I went for a walk around the ol' haunt and saw a rainbow and an insane sunset. There were only 2 other people walking and they both stopped me and wanted to talk about the rainbow and the sunset. I had my phone with me so I took some crappy phone pictures.

Boo

I got an email this morning that Ryan Adams, one of my most beloved music people of all time, is coming here. (I marked the email with a red label that says "PAY ATTENTION") However, it said Target Center. I was a little wary of that so I looked it up and he's opening for Oasis, one of my most disliked music people of all time. Why, God? Why, Ryan?

 

Is this tour going to be called the "We Think We Are Deities" tour? They also should have Creed opening for them. That would make it truly complete. Kidding. We all know that Ryan Adams is my boyfriend and I love him. He is kind of full of himself though.

 

Anyway, I probably won't be going to see "We Think We Are Deities" since gods usually charge a large amount for tickets to see them. Too bad.

Radio

I was just thinking about the radio and remembered the time like 6 years ago that an email of mine was read on BBC Radio. Coldplay was on a program of some sort and I wrote an email and it got read to them. Funny, huh? I wonder if that's online to listen to anywhere. I don't have a recollection of what program it was at all, but I think it was in the summer in 2002 right around when their album came out.

Gmail

One of my favorite things about Gmail is how, when you have ordered a package, and you get a tracking number in an email, Gmail puts a link up on the side with your tracking number so all you have to do is click. Love it.

Well, I'm getting myself drunk tonight. I think I might be voluntarily turning into an alcoholic. Not really, because I can count the number of times I've had alcohol this year on my hands, but whatever.

Hehe

Last night talking to Casey, we were discussing Sigur Rós and he said that the concert inspired him to write more music. He said he has most of a couple songs done but needs a pianist. Hehe (THAT'S ME, GET IT?)

Economy stuff

I listen to MPR all the time, and recently it's been 95% talk about the economy. I don't understand any of it, but for some reason I still listen. I think I like to hear voices. Just now I was listening to it and they were talking about the economy, as usual. They were discussing how the Dow dropped an unusual amount today. A guy was on, I don't even know who it was. But the news person said "Did you know the Dow dropped x amount today?" And he said "Oh my god." and was silent for about 5 or 10 seconds. He hadn't known, and the dread in his voice made me scared about it for the first time. That was a weird moment. I just even had to google what I was writing about because I wasn't sure I worded it right. Anyway, I thought it was interesting that that was the point at which I personally became a little worried. Previously, even though I "listen to" and "watch" news about it a lot, I didn't understand anything about it, but I guess audible dread did it for me.

 

In other news, I think my sinuses have reshaped themselves. Is that possible?

Blog entry

Hi, I don't know what to write. I did want to discuss an "argument" I had with someone about long hair, but I'm too lazy now. I went to see Sigur Rós last night with Laura, Michael, and Danielle (whose birthday it was). Also there were Brian from my work and Casey from my life. It was great as expected and I put some pictures on facebook. That's all for now.

Writing

I don't know what to write, but felt an obligation to write something. Not much is going on here, I guess. Working a lot. It's been pretty busy there (like I mentioned last time). I hereby retroactively take back what I said about almost not minding the stuff I'm doing filling in for the guy who had the baby. I have returned to hating it.

On my new team, we were already low on people and then one person got appendicitis and is out for a week! I hope she is ok.

Also, this other woman has been needing help writing a script. I spent probably 4 hours on Monday and Tuesday helping with that. That was kind of fun though.

It's funny though. Now suddenly everyone needs me to work on their stuff all the time. I kinda wish this could have happened earlier, but better late than never. Nowadays I don't have to read avclub for 4 hours a day anymore!

Well, off to eat and work on a project. 

WTF

I just got a call from the other place I applied at at U of M. They left a message to call back and I'm assuming it's for an interview. I wonder why it is that I suddenly get all this occupational interest.

 

Anyway, the interview went ok, not great. It was the version I don't like, which is "let's ask all these technical questions" instead of a getting to know you type thing. There were 4 people surrounding me asking me what version of PHP I usually use. I felt so dumb half the time. For the PHP question, I had a number in my mind, but I didn't really know if it was right. My website has this hosting package in which everything is installed for me and I don't have to do the maintenance on it. I think most small non-company websites are like that. I doubt there are many independent websites that have a person who actually does the server maintenance. I'd only know the version if I specifically went and looked for some odd reason, which I haven't done recently. So anyway a lot of the server stuff I didn't know about and I felt stupid. I also am not a great articulator when speaking, so that was fun as well. I can't get over some of the questions. They were so, so specific. Now that I'm thinking about it it really didn't go wonderfully because they seem to be really interested in a person who doesn't exist. Oh well. In the future, I'll look ahead of time at the PHP version that is installed on my server. At least I could answer most of the questions. I gave good answers to the database questions and most of the coding questions. I gave great answers to the design questions. They asked me why CSS was better than plain HTML. I'm an expert on that! They also asked me about testing for different browsers and for accessibility.

 

Anyway...I am covering for this guy who had a baby on Monday. I have been really busy all week with it and actually, I hate to admit it but I am almost enjoying it. I normally hate this job and avoid it as much as possible, but because I am being forced to do it for 2 weeks I am learning a TON. And I think it'll help me down the line. I seriously can't believe the amount I'm learning. It's been a long time since I tried to do something new. It's really nice though (as long as people aren't yelling at me, which they do sometimes because it is taking me a while to figure out certain things and they expect it fixed immediately) and like I said, it will really help me in the future to be one of the few people that understands this crap.

 

I'm kind of excited about this weekend because I have a bunch of projects I thought of to work on. Everybody wish L&M luck on their trip!!! Bon voyage!

Jeremy Messersmith

I learned about Jeremy Messersmith about 2 days ago. I love him. He's local and he just had an album out today. I went to get it at Electric Fetus and he's going to be there next Tuesday. I might go. I think he's great and his whole album is about the twin cities and what it's like to live here. It makes me very happy.

Look at his website.

www.jeremymessersmith.com

Very cute. The album art is adorable as well.

As if anyone cares

The leak was the air conditioner unit that is in my wall. I guess a pan overflowed. They tore up a part of the carpet and put a fan there. Then when it is dry they will clean the carpet.

I applied for 2 or 3 jobs at U of M. I think maybe just 2. I heard back this week from them both and actually I have an interview on 9/11 at The Supercomputing Institute! We'll see. If they offer a job, I think I'll only take it if they offer me an insanely great salary. 6 figures at least! Kidding. The day a webmaster makes 6 figures is the day that they webmast amazon.com or something.

Floor!

They didn't call back so I just called. I guess they power washed the patio area because they are going to paint, so she said maybe that's what it was. So they are going to look. I really hope that's the case. Anyway I'm going to lunch now.

More on the door

I am so nervous that they're going to want to replace the carpet. I would probably cry. If that happened, I would almost consider moving to a new place because I'd have to pack everything anyway. And the place I live in is really expensive. I saw this morning that the water went into the wood on the door frame. Wonderful. It is making me really uneasy. Good thing I didn't sign a lease for next year yet. I'm also kind of uneasy that they didn't call me back yet. If it gets to noon and they haven't called, I'm calling again.

Leak

So there has been a weird moldy smell in my apartment for a couple of days. I thought it was the trash at first but then I took out the trash and the scent is still there. Just now I went over to my patio door to check something. There is a chair there so I don't normally stand there. Suddenly my socks were wet. Awesome...they just replaced the patio doors a few weeks ago and mine must have leaked during the rainstorms. I feel bad I didn't notice it before, but I never go over there. What a hassle. So I called the office and was like "Uh...what should I do?" I guess now I'll have to clear the area so they can come in and clean it or something. This is so annoying. All I can say is they better not come in tomorrow at 7 am or something.

Yeah!!!!!

I just found out I got a very good raise with my new job! I'm so excited!!! I did not expect that they would be able to do that, considering the budget crisis we are in. Hopefully I won't cause the downfall of the business. :D

Idiot

I just found out that one of my forms has been broken for I don't even know how long. On my website. I wrote a new form a long time ago and originally I thought I had a backup system for it, but I am not sure now (well obviously it's not there now, if it ever was). This is a bummer.. Also at one point my password mysteriously expired and made my site not work (I have to put the password in one of the scripts). I noticed not long after that, but I wonder if that's what the problem is here. Probably there is some other script I forgot to update. I try to keep that all in one so things like this don't happen, but there is one directory I had to password protect and I think that this email thing uses a file in there. It's really interesting how quickly I forget this stuff. I coded all of it but I have no recollection about how it works. Every time I have to update something it's like I'm relearning my screwed up and backward coding techniques.

Anyway, I was looking at it because a job I applied for asked for some web development examples. I was going to give the URL to my content management system and that's when I realized it doesn't work suddenly. Now I don't know whether I should a) give the URL and say it's kind of not working, b) Fake a record and just hope it kind of works and not say anything, c) not give the URL. I think I'll probably choose b. Especially if the problem really is just adding the password somewhere - in that case I can fix that quick. Crod! That wasn't it. WTF? I guess I'll look at it tomorrow. What a bummer.

Chrome

Have you guys tried out the Google Chrome browser? I'm using it right now. Love it. My favorite thing so far is that you can search from the address bar. And you can make it be something else than a google search. I wonder if it would wiki something. I know that on Firefox you can set up prefixes, like "wiki something" would search wikipedia for that. Can't wait to try it out. This browser seems fast too, and I like how the tabs are....but, I'm not a tab user because I like seeing the titles all in the task bar. I'm a super window user, for sure. At work sometimes I have 20 open. And I have to open them in a specific order, and, I hate when they collapse. Anyway, try this out or at least read about it - seems cool so far.

Cinematic experience

It's about 12:30 on Sunday night and here I am! I'm in Rochester in my dad's extremely hot house. I swear they keep it at 80 at night. Anyway I just watched this movie called Werckmeister Harmonies. I learned about it from AV Club. It was totally up my alley; in fact, I loved it so much I felt I had to write a blog entry about it. I feel like my life just changed somehow. It was almost past good. It's funny, too. I stopped a bunch of times during the movie and I was googling during it to make sure it was in Hungarian because the dubbing and subtitles were weird and wasn't even THAT invested in it. Still though I feel strangely moved by it. I don't really suggest it for anyone else because it's Hungarian and 2.5 hours long. It's remarkably like Tarkovsky, another director I like, of whom I know most people I know have voiced dislike. But following this, I am planning on watching another movie by this director (Bela Tarr) which is 8 hours long. I anticipate really enjoying it. Everything I've heard about this 8-hour movie (called Satantango) is really good, even regarding the length. I've heard it's kind of like the Rocky Horror of Hungary. They have days where they just go watch that movie. So I'm getting it next on Netflix and I'm pretty excited about it. Another note: the music was gorgeous. I think it was composed specifically for this movie, which isn't weird, but I am rarely struck by a movie's score quite so much. Hope everyone is having a good weekend. Later.

MPR Doppelgänger

http://minnesota.publicradio.org/about/people/mpr_people_display.php?aut_id=30360

 

I was listening to the radio and thought this person had my same name. Today there was a piece about what it means to be a democrat. I thought the piece was really good. There will be a republican one next week. Speaking of that, I thought it would be cool to try to see the Daily Show, but tickets are long gone.

 

I made my first mistake of my new job today and feel horrible about it. It wasn't a huge deal but ugh. I sort of got a "try not to do that again" from my new boss. Oh well.

 

Ridiculous

The problem just got fixed just now. I have such hatred for my old/current job.

F it!

I'm leaving.

6:30

Still here...

Furious

I am so mad I want to cry. It's about work stuff again...

 

Last Friday they announced my new job at work. So I started doing that work. My boss wasn't happy about it and she is still controlling everything I do. Last week, she gave me orders on what I had to do this week. It was a thing I hated and a pointless thing I don't think I should have to do, especially since I'm leaving. I must have appeared mad because she set up a meeting for it today. Thus, I was hoping I could change it around a bit. So I went in to the meeting somewhat hopeful but it turns out it was more of a way to more publicly degrade me instead of doing it with just me and her. So now I have to do the thing I hate. I was so mad in the meeting, I almost cried in there.

 

Anyway the silver lining was that I don't have to do my regular old job anymore - just the thing I hate plus my new job. So I gladly handed over all of my work to her today.

 

Then as she's leaving she hands me the pager (which was part of my job which I THOUGHT was over). I was a little pissed but whatever. Not surprised at all.

 

Then, shit, I actually get a call. So, here I am at 6 and I'm still here and angry out of my f-ing gourd...I'm supposed to be done with this! Why am I here?! Countdown's on...when do you think I'll be able to leave? I say 7:30. I'm not happy about this. I'm so far beyond not happy I'm almost back to happy. Anyway, maybe I'll just leave. Whatever.

As promised

I accidentally got drunk I guess. Sarah got me addicted to this Mike's hard berry stuff so I had one and then I had some shots of vodka which burned my throat off. I don't really think the buzz is still there. Have you guys had this stuff - it's so good. It tastes really good. However, as I promised earlier in my blog, I took some shots of Reyka. I don't know why I have that stuff. Besides that it is from Iceland. It is vile. It sticks in your throat 30 seconds after a drink, like you have really bad heartburn there for a while. Then it gets ok. It's good at getting you drunk fast though, if that's what you're after. I remember one time when I discovered Reyka. It was at that cigar bar in Madison. Love at first drink! Not really. If that was true I'd drink it every day. I just noticed that it got me drunk fast. Then I texted my boyfriend at the time, and he texted back and Brighton said "That's a keeper" referring to the text. (I deleted it later because I don't like him anymore)

Casey has a masters in Medieval Icelandic. a) I don't live in the middle ages and b) Neither did he. I guess we all have to make do when nobody lives in the middle ages anymore. You can only love something so much. That doesn't mean you transform into it. I have never transformed into Iceland or England that I know of, or Sigur Rós, though that would be easier since those are people and not countries. Still though, it would be almost as difficult to transform into other people as it would be to transform into countries. The best I could do is maybe act like Sigur Rós.

Hi, this is Jón from Sigur Rós.

Did you really believe that? I doubt it.

My ass hurts. Ho! The Soup is on.

Soup's on! Coupson, Soupcon whatever. Where is that C with the thing on it?

Soupçon

Hey, it's a repeat.

Is there a last name Coupson? (My typo) Answer: Yes. I looked it up on 411.com. How about soupcon. There is one but in my opinion it's made up. Cat Soupcon. Made up.

It took me a long time to write "opinion" and then I had to talk about it again just now to say how long it took to write it. Lame.

Shit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The other day I was talking to Casey and I said a sentence that has never been said before. I am kind of upset. I spent some time doing some lyrics for him and I sent them on Sunday and he never wrote back. That bothers me a lot and I have been talking about it in therapy. Sheena says it's just different email personalities but really, a week?

WALKING

one of the books I bought the other day is super cute. here it is.

http://www.amazon.com/Langenscheidt-Universal-Norwegian-Dictionary-Norwegian-English/dp/1585735833/ref=pd_bbs_sr_2?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1219466384&sr=8-2

It's microscopic!!!!!!! It literally is. You have to put it into a slide to see it.

walking again on broken glass!

Does anyone remember when I used to have to pretend like I could walk straight?

Do you guys remember when I used to love Dan? Wow, he's married now. Hmmmm

Hi, I'm Dan. You guys didn't believe that either, right? I am now thinking back to what i wrote about the middle ages. I think I was mistaken. I meant to say, no matter how much you love A TIME, you can't TRAVEL TO THAT TIME. At least not now. You just have to pretend like you're there. Like, sometimes, if I want, I could probably pretend I lived in 1996. Then I would really like Gavin Rossdale and Kerri Strug and things like that. But, I don't actually live in 1996, even though at one time I did. The same thing could be done with Medieval times, except it would be harder because we don't have memories of that. We have to read sources. The other day, when I was talking to someone and we talked about primary sources. I ended up blabbing on (Like I am now except not quite this bad) about how I didn't like school.

Dangerous Minds Think Alike. Did you know? A child who walks close to a fire will not do that again. Also they might smell bad.

I think that last sentence is funny. It relates to something I read earlier. I don't want to explain it because it is in ICELANDIC. (Actually Norwegian)

Similarly, I'M TYPING SO HARD I MIGHT BREAK MY MAC BOOK AIR

Hey. Do you guys remember when I used to work at the library? I remember that. Suddenly I am Tire. I wrote that instead of TIRED and I am not going to change it. So, shit, I am tired and I think that I will go to Bed soon. Perhaps I will watch some CSI. I do that a lot late. Why can't I write "LATELY"? I watch CSI A LOT LATELY. There. My cat likes this blanket I have. LATELY (actually always) he sleeps on one corner of my blanket in a way which prevents me from moving. How can One Cat do that? I do not know. He might be more than One Cat. Maybe he is a whole blanket of cats.

áfram elísabet! [picture of the statue on the WI capitol building]

WELCOME ABROAD ELIZABETH! Go forth into the Medieval!

Weird

I'm weirdly drunk or something. Maybe I'll have some shots. Back at ya later. It might be interesting to write.

Light Babs

"Buy energy efficient light babs!" - Paul and Morgan Hamm

 

I apologize for my depressing rant the other day. I also wanted to publicly say thanks to my friends who listen to my crap all the time. I appreciate everyone very much. I am including the one work person who reads my blog. You know who you are! I hereby issue a blanket exclusion over you with regard to all the work crap I talk about because you have a magical ability not to get involved, which I envy and admire. I was going to write all this last month but didn't.

 

Today my new job was made public and it was incredibly awesome with a couple tinges of weird. The weird coming from my current/former boss. My new boss is great and guess what, I DID WORK TODAY!!!!! That did more for my mood than anything. By the way, I have a new job (at my same company). For those who don't know.

 

I located a person on facebook who is a "friend" (as much as you can be) on AV Club. That was awesome and I was excited. The other day some guy thought I was a guy and got pissed at me for something related to that. It was the same guy who was "pissed" (for lack of a better word) that I knew Icelandic. I just laughed. That guy is an ass. (and his screen name is That guy which makes things funny).

 

 

Things I don't understand

It seems like the past couple of weeks have been really weird for me. For one thing, a lot of people aren't talking to me anymore for whatever reason. I am feeling really isolated. For another thing, my Casey situation was going really well and then just tanked.

 

I am really depressed about the last thing. I've been dealing ok with the various friends who aren't friends anymore (in fact I managed to make up with Joel), but I had high hopes for him. I talked to him today and it was not a great conversation and he just seemed really disinterested. I don't know what's up, if he's busy or actually isn't interested or what. It just sucks and I don't know whether I should continue. Probably if I didn't say anything he would never talk to me again.

 

I just wish anyone would even fake like they're interested in anything about what's going on with me.

Are you fucking serious?

This is what our world is like in 2008.



In other, far cuter news, here is a picture of my cat from this weekend.

Ugh

So this morning I noticed Joel was acting weird, and Nancy was still not talking to me. I asked Joel, jokingly, if they had a meeting about not talking to me. To my surprise, he said yes. I was still thinking he was joking but he wasn't. He was like "It wasn't pretty and I am not telling you details. I'm not discussing anything with you anymore." I'm in shock. I have absolutely no idea what I did. He's been gone for the last 5 or so days, too, so I couldn't have said something to him. And now basically everyone in Joel and Nancy's group is giving me the silent treatment. I can't think of anything that has happened or what could have caused this. I guess maybe my boss could have sent an email or something to their boss? But why aren't they telling me what it's about?

 

Anyway I feel like a complete outcast today and I have no idea why.

 

About 4 months ago or so a similar thing happened where my boss said not to talk to the other group. She told me it involved everyone but I asked other people and they had no idea what I was talking about. I think this is a similar thing. For some reason my boss and other managers seem to be singling me out. It sounds really paranoid but that's what's happening. Nobody else is having meetings about how to respond to individual people. Nobody else gets lectures about who to talk to, either. This is like the Twilight Zone or something. I don't get it. My office has THE worst office politics I've ever seen or heard of or can imagine. It's turned into psychological warfare or something.

 

I think tonight I'm going to email both of them and ask if they could at least give me a hint about something. I'm in a weird position right now. I understand they probably are being pressured, but I'm their friend. The least they could do is tell me if I did something or not.

 

This is all utter bullshit. I feel like crap. This is messing with my brain. Hopefully I can talk to casey tonight.

Wednesday night can't come fast enough

Nancy's mad at me now and won't talk to me. I'm not completely sure why, but I have been really pissy at everyone lately so I think I must have said something.

 

To answer Candy's questions from yesterday (I am just going to do it here): It's not because she wants to avoid conflict - I think she prefers to stir up conflict. The best I can guess is that it's just another way for her to force me not to have "power" that she doesn't. She has me completely under her control in every way. She assigns all of my work, she doesn't let me do other extra work (that would allow me to become a better worker and would also get more stuff done for the company), she doesn't let me bring up constructive ideas, and she even tells me who I can and can't talk to. If I ever talk to certain people within our company and she finds out, I always get a lecture. I'm not even exaggerating at all on any of that.

 

And also, about being angry, you're right, I don't get outwardly angry in a confrontational sense. I just get really pissy towards people in a more passive way, and I'm inwardly extremely angry. I've been extremely edgy at work and not my usual nice-acting self. Everything sets me off and causes me to respond back in a kind of mean manner. I really haven't been a pleasant person, I don't think. Which is probably why Nancy isn't talking to me. I haven't been very pleasant outside of work either, so I'm sure everyone I know is just delighted to talk to me.

 

My boss is definitely 90% of the problem. I've tried to talk to different people about it but nobody can really do anything. It would help if I could move out of this position into somewhere where she isn't my boss, but I don't think that's going to happen. So, I need to leave. The other 10% of the problem is just the organization of our company. It's like rotten from the inside or something. Actually in my mind's eye I see it as a bowl of jello. It seems like just random crap going everywhere and being confused.

 

Hopefully I'll be able to get this crap out of my head on Wednesday and Thursday so I won't be pissed off at the wedding. I'm sure I'll be fine.

Anger management

Do I need anger management or something? Seriously, I think I sometimes have a problem. Anyway, I'm looking for a new job when I get back from vacation. I really, really hate my job right now. That's not even the half of it. I have gone through many phases in the past few weeks regarding my job. Just now I reached despair and rock bottom. Funny, I have a certain sense of calm now. The eye of the storm, perhaps. I'm officially past the point of trying to change anything here. This place is so messed up. I had a little bit of optimism before and thoughts that maybe with enough hope and work I could make things better. A resounding NO has been forcefully shot back at me into my forehead. For one thing, I asked my boss point blank last week if I could bring up a concern with someone. She said no. What the fuck? Seriously? No? I was basically asking her as a courtesy so she'd know I was going to do it. Whatever. No it is then. Jerks, all of them.

Bridezillas

I was just watching Bridezillas and the one tonight was quite the "keeper". My god, she was a bitch. I have a hard time thinking of people who seem so truly bitchy in every sense of the word. There have been 1 or 2 on this show who I can't believe anyone would ever marry. People like that make me wonder why I, one of the nicest people I know, don't even have a boyfriend. Yes, I realize it's conceited to say I'm one of the nicest people I know, but seriously, I do consider myself on the kind end of the spectrum. While that might not completely apply to the relationship end of things (though I do think I'm still nice in relationships, I just might have other issues), these ladies are ridiculous. This lady tonight - I've never seen anyone behave like that towards anyone. I can't believe that guy married her. Plus, he has been with her for 6 years. I almost wonder if he has a fear of non-commitment. Sort of like what I think girls have. A fear of being alone, I guess. God help that dude. This other lady was sort of a bitch but it was more generalized instead of directed at her husband. She was just a mean person who didn't know manners. The lady tonight specifically berated her husband about every possible thing he did. She told him to shut up every other word, etc. Like I said, I've never seen a person behave like that towards anyone. There was never any niceness at all from her, not even at her ceremony. Ugh. I'm glad I don't know her.

Yay!

If a reader of this blog were so inclined, he or she could go to my facebook page and notice that the guy I've been talking about for the last couple of weeks is my newest friend on facebook. He did that himself. It saved me some more brain-ache because I had been trying to figure out how I could non-creepily do that. We were talking tonight and he is so cute. Somehow I managed to be able to get him to talk to me first, which he's done the last few days, and I have to say it's kind of a relief. This is turning out surprisingly and suspiciously well so far. I also can't stop talking about it, which I assume is really annoying for anyone I know.

But let me talk more about it. Because you can skip this part, and if you're talking to me in real time it's harder to skip it. We talked in Icelandic and it was so fun, and we talked about Germanic languages. Who does that??? We decided we had to have met before in Madison. Ahhh...he's so sweet too. I'm so glad about that. I appreciate it when guys are not jerks right off the bat and are in fact the total opposite. I also made a joke about how I'm in real life made of silver and am a robot, because of my facebook picture that I said was in no way Photoshopped. And he said "we'll see soon for sure!" :) What else...oh, he asked if I knew about the UW Icelandic dictionary, and I said, "know it? I worked on that" and he was excited. And I showed him the page there which lists my name at the bottom. :) :) And we talked about music! And iambic pentameter! And Icelandic sagas! And how this one Sigur Rós song is best described as "tragic"! And how we'd never want to be 15 again!

 

I think it's safe to say this conversation went better than the last one. Thank goodness. I'm still greatly nervous about the whole deal, but I REALLLLLLYYYYYYYY REALLY REALLY like him.

Verbal diarrhea

That's the word I was looking for last night.

 

Wow, I had an awesome start to the week. I learned that our company is instituting mandatory vacation for some people in order to cut costs. So guess who's stuck alone at work for the next two weeks? Yo. Then I got yelled at immediately when I got in for some convoluted crap that I don't even really care about anymore. Then I did some work and my boss went around and passed it off as her own. I kind of expect to be fired in about two weeks so don't be surprised if I come back from my own vacation without a job. I'm so over it. I currently could not care any less about my job. After Thursday and Friday (where I got continually lectured to all day) I have built up a heart of steel. I hate my job with a passion...but nobody would ever know. I think I'm too easy to get mad at or an easy scapegoat or something. I was upset on Thursday. Then on Friday I was mad. Today, I just quit caring. The last three days at my job have been ridiculous. I honestly don't think the company is going to last much longer. It's total chaos there. And then they institute mandatory vacation. Whatever. If I get fired, good riddance. I really hate my job. I really, really do. How and why did I stay there so long?

 

Anyway, I'm also getting a cold and I just popped about 27 pills so I'm going to take a nap before I have to get up in like 5 more hours to go back to my awesome cube and withstand another day of shit from everyone who encounters me. Also, I'll do some work and someone else will say they did it. Then, someone will tell me I have to work on something immediately that I've never seen before, and it needs to be done in 5 minutes. Then when I don't get it done, I'll get in trouble. Then people will come in and complain to me about something. Then I'll get attitude from people. Then I'll get excluded from meetings I need to go to, and emails I need to read. Then the next day someone will yell at me for not having followed directions on the email I didn't get (that actually happened today). Then I'll go talk to Nancy and get a lecture about it. You know what happened last week? I was looking for a spreadsheet on a network drive we have, and I found out by accident that some people had moved all the spreadsheets two months ago and didn't tell us. I was so mad...I told my boss and she told her boss and then it was brought up to the people who did it and they basically said "Tough shit". Whatever. You cost me two hours of my time which could have been saved by CCing me on an email. That's the kind of shit that happens. It's just, people tell their friends information, and you have to be lucky to get information you need to do your fucking job. I hate that place.

Bah

I just talked to C for a couple hours and I feel not so great about it. I kind of was weird, I don't like how I acted. The crappy part is he's gone (ironically, to Duluth and Madison) for the next 7 days. And then we can talk for like 1 day and then I'm gone for around 9 days. Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhh. I feel like an idiot. I went off on Sigur Ros and Coldplay and stuff. I was just excited because he started the conversation, which has never happened. Blerg, I can't stop my idiotic brain from spewing forth crap without any kind of stop. I can't do that. Ok, I just need to realize that that's how I am. I'm a moronic brain-spewer and if that bothers him I guess it's not meant to be. He didn't seem to be that put off by it, in fact he seemed completely normal so I really hope I did not do any damage. My problem is when I start talking about myself, which I have been trying not to do for some reason, I inevitably say something that doesn't sound right and then I have to figure out how to give an explanation and it just snowballs into a huge thing. God I'm an idiot. Ah well, he seemed fine and was funny as usual and so cute. So hopefully it's fine. Actually, I showed him my website and I seemed a little self conscious about it so he sent me some of his music and said that since I showed my work he'd show his. :) V. sweet.

Odd connection after odd connection

So I was talking to the guy I like tonight, and we found out that we worked at the same library in college at the same time, possibly on the same floor. I couldn't believe it. Sometimes I wonder if he is the same person as me. Actually I just can't get over the fact that he knows Icelandic. I have been thinking about it, and in the back of my mind that is a really important thing to me, but I sort of ignored it because nobody knows it. It's hard to talk about with anyone, even though I'd love to discuss it 100% of the time. So it is constantly a really nice surprise to say stuff that he actually knows. He likes languagey stuff a lot. Tonight we talked briefly about nerdy word stuff. I'm in heaven! See what I mean though? He likes my same bands, and all the rest of the stuff I mentioned - if you were to only know the stuff I told you, you would think he was me. Really he's not though. Mostly because he is a guy and I'm not. But also because he's pretty different than me in some ways. Such as, he works 60 hours a week. I don't do that. Also, he has more education than me. So know you know the key differences. 1) guy, 2) work volume, 3) masters. Also, he is taller and has a different color hair. That may be it, though. (Ok, it's totally not, but you get my drift here I hope)

choke/vomit/faint/die/other body functions

I just asked the guy that I like out and he said yes!!!!!!! Oh shit, now what do I do????????????????????????????????????????????

Dentist

I went to the dentist this morning. At 7. It was early. I had a pain in my tooth so I was kind of nervous, especially since I hadn't been there for probably 4 years. But they did some tests, and they said "your teeth look perfectly fine". I have to get a replacement filling because one is almost gone, but apparently the pain is from stress or some kind of trauma like biting down too hard! And he gave me an exercise to de-stress my teeth. I was like, did I go to a homeopathic dentist or something? Hahaha...Anyway I got lucky. Nothing was painful at all and I can't believe they look fine. And I really like that dentist so it turned out really well. And it's right next door to where I live so I just walked.

 

P.S. NOW DO YOU SEE WHY I USE A STRAW????

A Point For Me!

I gained the guy's email address and IM!!!!!! (The other day when we were talking it was just within the same website at which I located him)

 

Things are looking up! This makes up for my "accident" today! (Which I foolishly told everyone about and then got made fun of all day long)

 

I am also feeling good because I finally got my economic stimulus check yesterday.

 

P.S. I am doing a website for my uncle, who runs a music company. I have seen some interesting things on his website. It kind of confuses me. One question though. Let's pretend Jesus were to return to Earth tomorrow. Would that be considered the Second Coming? I'm doubting myself because one of my uncle's albums is called The Third Coming. I was like, is that even a thing? I'm totally confused now. Plus, on the description he talks about all kinds of gods and stuff, not just Jesus, though the cover of the album has a picture of Jesus on it. He insists that album is not religious. I'll have to give y'all the URL when I'm done. My uncle is a very odd person.

Idiot (me)

I just went to lunch with Nancy, and on the way back (I was driving) I got into my first car accident of my driving career. Of course, the law was in effect under which I only do stupid crap when someone else is in the car. I drive perfectly when I'm alone. Nobody's going to want to ride with me anymore!! :( Anyway I was turning right and my turn was too wide and I just hit a car that was coming the other way. It wasn't hard. The guy actually laughed and drove off, so no biggie I suppose. His bumper was already smashed up. I have a crack in mine now. Nancy thought it was funny. I just feel like an idiot. Ah well. Nancy was telling me "Why didn't you stop?!?!?"

Jimmy Eat World

Here is a video I took tonight at the Jimmy Eat World show. Ok, this isn't looking half as good as it does on my computer. Sorry about that. But I guess you get the idea. They're playing "Lucky Denver Mint". The show was really good. I loved it. And Jim is so sexy. I think I have mentioned it before, but Jim Adkins playing and singing is probably the sexiest thing I've ever seen. Ben Gibbard also elicits a similar response from me, but Jim is really over the top. I think it's because he always gets completely soaked in sweat. Then he always flings his head around and sweat goes flying. I love it. The way he moves is just ahhh. I've seen this band maybe 5 times and every time it's been excellent. They are a great band. I will try to process my videos more at some point and get some stills out of them. I don't think the stills I took are that great. Jim is the one in the middle.

To further my thoughts on this, I found this listi yfir beautiful people that I made a while back. By the way, listi yfir means list of in Icelandic. It's just a thing that's stuck in my head.

Speaking of AVC

I highly recommend today's Hater. I saw this commercial many times over the weekend and was happy to see it posted on Hater. But totally read all the comments. This is one of the funnier comment collections I've seen. I'm crying over them.

 

http://www.avclub.com/content/hater/never_forgetting_has_never_looked

AV Club idea

On AV Club blog today there was a thing for picking an album for every year you were born. I guess it's going around the blogosphere. I feel horrible that I just used that word. Here is mine. I pretended I was born in 1994 because I don't particularly love anything from before then. Look on wikipedia if you want to do it. They have listis yfir albums per year. It's fun!

1994 "Grace" Jeff Buckley
1995 "The Bends" Radiohead
1996 "Tidal" Fiona Apple
1997 "OK Computer" Radiohead
1998 "Something About Airplanes" Death Cab for Cutie
1999 "Ágætis byrjun" Sigur Rós
2000 "Parachutes" Coldplay
2001 The unfortunately titled "Bleed American" Jimmy Eat World
2002 "A Rush Of Blood To The Head" Coldplay/"Lifted" Bright Eyes
2003 "Michigan" Sufjan Stevens
2004 "Funeral" Arcade Fire
2005 "Illinois" Sufjan Stevens/"Takk" Sigur Rós/"I'm Wide Awake, It's Morning"/"Digital Ash in a Digital Urn" Bright Eyes
2006 "Putting the Days to Bed" The Long Winters
2007 "Neon Bible" Arcade Fire
2008 "Með suð í eyrum við spilum endalaust" Sigur Rós

Swoon

I listened to the music today. So good. His voice sounds a little like David Cook (that's what came to mind anyway). Maybe I should call him David Cook on my blog.

 

David Cook's music is really introspective and quiet, yet his voice sounds really strong and like it's about to break out of the song.

 

:D

 

God I hope there isn't some way David Cook could somehow find my blog. (Not the real one, I wouldn't care about that)

I'm on top of the world!

i just talked to THE GUY (ok, can i give him a fake name or something? i'll think about it) for 3 hours!!!!! :D :D :D :D :D i feel so delighted! we said icelandic words to each other and i told him he was cute. :D oh yes and he gave me some of his music to listen to (he's recorded some). I haven't listened yet though.

Cesspools

I've been googling for a while trying to find this quote from Saves The Day about how message boards are cesspools of ignorance and hatred. It's true. I can't find it though.

 

I'm having a shitty day, which hasn't been helped by my attempt to get some help on something I was working on from people on a message board. I always take things personally. I just looked at the CP one for the first time in years because I know I had the cesspool quote on there, but it's not there anymore. I did see 3 emails from 2004, though. I'm surprised they're still there. It's funny to see all those people. But I'd rather kill myself than try to post on there again. UGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I also just searched for my old old boyfriend from like 8 years ago, which is never a good idea for me to do.

 

But, I have gotten a couple more emails from THE GUY and am looking forward to another one, hopefully tonight. I'm not quite to the point where I feel like I can ask if he wants to meet. I've only known about him for a week and a half.

 

The AV Club is one different message board; I think partly because it's just comments. I haven't ever gotten personally offended at something on there the way I do from other ones. Also, almost every single thing on there is funny and for the most part it all stems from the same subject (whatever article you're on). In that sense it seems quite a bit less childish than certain other places. Also, the people are older and therefore hopefully more mature.

 

Well, I'm going to try to continue on my project WITHOUT help so I can maintain my peace of mind. Later.